Faith remembered that night like it was yesterday. It had been a long time though, and she knew it.

Memories of things past floated around in her brain, always ending on the night.

It was the same thing, over and over and over again.

She got no respite, no break from it.

Even her subconsious wouldn't let her forget it. She was in a fucking coma and she still remembered it all.

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The rythm was fast, the music pumped. Faith could feel it, filling the room, flowing through her veins.

Then it stopped.

Faith looked over to see what was going on, and there she was. Beautiful as ever, and mad as hell. Faith didn't need to ask, she knew why Buffy was here.

Although she knew, she also wondered about what had gone wrong. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. Buffy was to be at his bedside. Watching him DIE. He was supposed to be DEAD!

Buffy was supposed to hate her, she was supposed to hate Buffy. Clean cut and simple.

Faith was going to skip town right before the ascension, and leave it at that. Maybe call on the Mayor for a few favours later on, but it ended there.

Or, it was supposed to.

"Thought I'd stop by."

Faith had to say it. She knew it would hurt Buffy but she had to.

"Is he dead yet?"

Buffy didn't look like herself anymore. She had lost all feeling. Her normally sensitive green eyes were empty and distant. It scared Faith.

"He's not gonna die. It was a good try, though. Your plan?"

Faith wasn't going to let this be one-sided. She would go down, and she would let Buffy take her down, but she was going to inflict pain first.

"Uh-huh. The Mayor got me the poison. Said it was wicked painful."

"There's a cure." Buffy was totally unmoving.

"Damn. What is it?"

"Your blood. As justice goes, it's not un-poetic, don't you think?"

It was. It really was. Probably the most poetic thing Faith had ever heard. At least in the justice department.

"Come to get me? You gonna feed me to Angel? You know you're not going to take me alive."

"Not a problem."

No, it won't be a problem. You can have me. Put me out of my fucking misery.

Faith looked Buffy up and down fully, one last time. Like a final drag off a last cigarette before an inmates execution.

The firing squad had arrived, dressed to kill.

"Well, look at you. All dressed up in big sister's clothes."

"You told me I was just like you. That I was holding it in."

You aren't like me. Don't ever say that again. You are so much better than me. So high up.

Faith and Buffy approached each other until they were standing face to face.

She smelled so good.

"Ready to cut loose?"

"Try me."

Well, it's worth a shot...

"Okay then. Give us a kiss."

Buffy punched her in the jaw. Ouch.

They continued on, fighting with each other. For Faith, the battle was just as much on the inside as it was the outside.

Each of Buffy's strikes left a far bigger and more painful emotional wound than a physical one.

Buffy was easing up, letting her guard down. Faith was going to let her win, but it had to be a good fight. She was'nt going down without a band so loud it would wake up the whole fucking town.

"Not getting tired are you? I'm just startihg to feel it."

No. She knew that would set Buffy off. And it did.

Rejuvinated by Faith's comments, they continued to fight.

Soon the fell together through the big window, landing on Faith's terrace.

Well, that was loud. Faith slowly got up. Much to her suprise, Buffy snapped cuffs on them.

Where the hell did she get handcuffs? MotherfuckingAngel... sick bastard...

Not that she wouldn't have liked to use cuffs on Buffy, just that she was jealous.

"Stick around."

Always with the goddam puns. She couldn't shut up. Even in battle, a battle against her, Faith still found the puns endearing.

The fight went on.

"What's the matter? All that killing, you afraid to die?"

That hurt. That really hurt. If only she knew. If only Buffy knew.

Faith spun Buffy so she could get the leverage to use her legs, and managed to snap the handcuff chain.

Again a face off. This time, it ended with Faith holding a length of pipe, and Buffy pulling Faith's knife.

Dirty pool.

"That's mine."

"You're about to get it back."

Such an attitude. Faith remembered the good times, she loved that attitude.

They exchanged blows, Faith dodged the knife. They moved to the edge of the terrace and Faith held Buffy at there.

You know I can't do it. You know I'd never be able to push you, or throw you, or stab you. I just hope you can do it to me. End it all for me.

"Man, I'm going to miss this."

Faith eased her grip just enough so Buffy could break it without suspecting anything.

Here's your chance girlfriend. Faith left an opening. She moved her left arm up, just slightly.

Buffy broke Faith's grip and plunged the knife into her abdomen.

Both of them looked stunned for a moment.

Faith was stunned partly because Buffy actually did it, and partly because it didn't hurt. In fact, the cool metal sliding into her abdomen eased the pain. Pain that had been with her since before she could even remember. Death...Faith hoped it would bring her peace.

"You did it."

Her voice was weak, but the smile never left her face. Faith threw Buffy away from her. If Buffy hated her, it would be easier on both of them.

"You killed me."

Just as the knife hadn't hurt, searing pain filled her when she told Buffy she killed her. At that moment, everything changed.

Buffy changed. Her deep green eyes regained their sensitivity, the window to Buffy's soul had opened.

Everything Faith had wanted to see, but been afraid to even wish for, what she had dreamed of since the day she laid eyes on the blonde slayer, it was all there. Spilling out and into their locked gaze, was what Buffy had kept hidden, much like Faith had.

Love and passion rushed forth. Only, their was a dark edge of sadness over it all. Buffy really had killed her, and they both knew it.

If only things could have been diffent...if only they could have talked...let each other know, just somehow, in anyway communicated the love they both felt before it was too late.

No times for what if's and if only's. Faith climbed onto the low wall at the edge of the terrace and looked down.

Buffy wouldn't have taken her to Angel. She knew that. They both knew that. It was an unspoked agreement.

But Faith wanted to make Buffy's life easy. Despite all the talking their eyes had just done, they left what they both knew unsaid.

Letting Buffy have the opportunity to take her to Angel would have made it too hard for her. Buffy had to have a clean cut excuse.

"Still won't help your boy,though. Shoulda been there, B, quite a ride."

Faith let herself fall backwards off the wall. She felt herself land on something hard and then the world went black.

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And so it's been until now. Every second of her comatose life, reliving the same story over and over again.

Like never ending torture. Dreams of what could have and should have been.

Images that haunt her mind, never leaving her. Never giving her peace.

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Somewhere in the hospital there was music playing. It was "Gone to the Movies" by Semisonic.

Buffy found the music soft and soothing. She needed it, everytime she went and saw Faith things were tense. The girl was in a coma and yet she could still whip Buffy into a frenzy...easily.

The music played.

**"Now the rain comes down the windows and it
Drops onto the forehead of the waiting girl
She surveys her rental kingdom and she
Wonders if she's really lost her one joy"**

She took a deep breath and steadied herself. She walked into the room and sat down by Faith's bed. Faith looked so frail and weak. Buffy remembered the time Faith had told her that the only thing she needed was herself and nothing else.

How ironic that was. She couldn't even breathe on her own now.

**"Another fool would go down to the
Only place she ever went to lose herself
She's gone to the movies now
and she don't need your help"**

Buffy started to think. Think about all the things that she wanted to say and never got a chance to.

"There was so much left for us to do, and I had so many things to say. I don't want it to end like this..."

Buffy started to sob quietly.

**"Now the rain turns into snowfall as the
City sky reflects the silver street below
And it covers up the cars and the Wall-
Flowers cd ended half an hour ago"**

"I left so many questions, and there are so many things unanswered. So many important things unsaid. You...you did this all for me. Look how it left you..."

Buffy thought back to that night. It was mostly a blur, up until the last moment.

She wondered if Faith ever thought about it, or if she could even think in her coma.

For Buffy, the moment had remained suspended in time.

The whole thing repeatedly running in slow motion through her head.

**"Another fool would dig the broken car out from the snow
And drive to find the show
She's gone to the movies now and she's not coming home
She's gone to the movies now and she's not coming home"**

The knife. The mistake. The look on Faith's face.

All of it. Every fucking thing. Faith had done it all for her. And all she got in return was a knife in the gut and a hospital room.

Buffy found herself hoping. hopeing something would change. Hoping Faith would heal miraculosly.

Finally, she hoped that wherever Faith was going, would be better than here.

**"Now she looks around her place and anyways
There's nowhere she could sit beside the bed
And she wonders if the car will start tomorrow
or she'll have to take the bus instead"**

How could she lose her? Lose her before she even really had her?

Tears were flowing freely, falling down her cheeks and into nothingness.

"I'm so sorry. I made mistakes...lot's of mistakes, and I wish-I wish things could have been different."

As if to say 'so do I' , as if to give her comfort, or at least to try, Faith's hand gently squeezed Buffy's.

That's what it was to Buffy. What it was in reality, that's anyone's guess.

A tear rolled down Faith's face. Was it Buffy's? Or was it really Faith's? It rolled down onto the bleached pillow.

Buffy leaned down and kissed Faith. Not on the forehead, but the lips. And not deep, it was simply the most loving and chaste kiss any two people could have shared.

Before she left, Buffy had to say one more thing.

"Faith...if your in this for me..." She continued to sob. "Just know that I love you."

**"Any other fool would be out on the roadway
Trying to spot her rusted Pontiac
She's gone to the movies now and she's not coming back
She's gone to the movies now and she's not coming back"**

Buffy looked down sadly one last time.

The heart monitor flatlined. And for Faith, it ended the fight of her life.